


The Light

by alphalester



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe, Angst, Childhood Friends, Depression, First Kiss, Fluff, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Lies, M/M, Mental Hospital, Nurse!Dan, Patient!Phil, Phil's Family Are ALL FICTIONAL IN THIS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-07
Updated: 2018-01-14
Packaged: 2019-01-30 20:48:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12661140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alphalester/pseuds/alphalester
Summary: - COMPLETE -Dan is studying to become a nurse at university which means he is required to do two weeks every semester at a work placement. Dan has been sent to Honey-Oake Mental Hospital for patients who have mental health conditions and can't look after themselves. Here, he makes some life long friends and even reunites with a friend of his who he thought had died years ago.





	1. Chapter 1

"Mr Howell, are you listening?" 

I was startled out of my reverie by the gentle voice which was suddenly too close. I blinked a few times before nodding rapidly before beginning to write down the notes that I would need to remember. There was no chance that I would remember everything, it was nearly impossible. This section of Honey-Oake had thirteen patients in alone, and that was only the part of the building that they had named "D ward". I wouldn't need to remember everything anyway, I was only here for two weeks on a work placement scheme that I needed in order to pass my university course. There had been too many people in my class in need of a work placement so when they heard I was wanting to go into Mental Health Nursing they snapped that right up, sending me to Honey-Oake instead of a general hospital like everyone else. 

"Alright then, Mr Howell. I shall hand you over to the lovely Louise now. You will shadow her today and get a feel for the place" The Doctor informed me before taking my hand in his in a too-firm handshake. A bubbly girl with blonde hair bounced in front of me, wearing jogging bottoms and a hoodie. She didn't really look like she were at work which made me question if this were truly who would be my mentor for the day. She smiled at me in a way that was incredibly comforting which settled all of the nerves that I hadn't even known I were feeling. 

"Hello, you must be Daniel? My name is Louise" The blonde spoke quietly, something told me she didn't usually speak so quietly but there must have been a reason. I nodded and she smiled once again, guiding me out of the reception office and over to the staff room. "Right, Dan. So in D ward we have a relatively quiet lot" Louise chuckled, grabbing some notes off of the table and writing her name on them and signing her life away as my mother would call it. "We do have thirteen in here, but all but one of them are heavily sedated right now, so they won't be a problem today anyway". I smiled, at least not all of them were gonna be shouting at me today then. "We need to monitor the twelve on the main section of D ward but the thirteenth is Mr Lester, he has his own room just off of the ward. 

Lester. Why did that name sound so familiar? 

Louise had explained to me that they wear comfortable clothing such as pyjamas or jogging bottoms so that the patients relax more, feeling more like a friend were helping them rather than a doctor or a nurse. It also meant that it wasn't as restricting as we moved around the ward which I was incredibly grateful to hear. Louise guided me out onto the ward, as well as introducing me to another male nurse known as PJ. He was lovely and welcomed me as if I were going to fit in well here, I chuckled , _as a nurse or as a patient_ my brain supplied. We did the main rounds of observations, which apparently were done once in the morning and once at night. We would check temperature, blood pressure and heart rate as well as irritability, pain and so on. We got one bed at the end to find a patient who's whiteboard above his bed said _"Christopher Kendall"_ and in seconds it was clear that the young adult had a soft spot for PJ. 

"Where's my beautiful boy today?" Chris slurred, whatever medication he were on clearly tiring him out a bit. Louise just chuckled, walking closer and sitting beside the boy on the bed. She took one of his hands in hers, which she told me she would never be able to do if he hadn't had his medication due to his irritability. "Chris, you know that PJ is coming to see you after he checks on Phil, okay?" Chris huffed and let his head lull onto Louise's shoulder. "Why is Phil more important?" he was almost crying now, before he perked up instantly at the sound of PJ's voice.  
"Chris! I'm here buddy!" PJ said in a tone which was both calm as well as inviting. Louise informed me this was the only ward where you were able to get close and connect one-on-one with patients. It was the only one safe to do so if the patients weren't agitated. It was a day-to-day thing though, never expect that you could be the same everyday. I watched PJ and Chris interact. The way the boy was looking at the nurse was incredible. Louise merely chuckled, leaving PJ with Chris as we walked back to the desk. We took a seat behind it, watching all of the patients who seemed just so... ordinary i suppose. If you looked at them you would never even suspect they had severe mental health conditions which caused them to be sectioned and monitored by trained personnel. 

 

A few hours had passed and I was now very used to the twelve patients in the main section of ward D, I had been shown their medications and read up on various conditions which they were dealing with. I felt quite calm, assisting the nurses with everything as if I were already part of the team. I also learned that PJ made a really good cup of tea which he informed me he 'slurped' for effect. It was now approaching midday, which was when we escorted patients to the dinner tables in the next room and they ate with weird rubbery plastic cutlery which couldn't injure them in anyway. Slowly, we got the twelve patients into the dining room where other staff and even some doctors were watching in case of choking and basically monitoring every possible hazard. "What about Phil?" I heard PJ ask Louise, she merely shook her head in response before adding "he wanted to stay on the ward. 

"Is Phil safe to be on his own?" I asked, this 'Phil Lester' was a complete mystery to me. I hadn't been told anything about him besides the fact he had his own room and didn't want to be around people much. I took it upon myself to go back to the ward, my curiosity eating me as I just told Louise that I wanted to make sure everything was clean and tidy before lunch finished. She nodded and smiled, telling me to get her if I needed anything. Once I had walked back into the ward, everything was different. The entire energy was different. The yellow-white walls seemed to hold more life in them. My breath caught in my throat as I saw the figure sitting on the floor staring out of the large window. The first thing I noticed was the jet black hair and broad shoulders. I heard him gasp as he looked in the window at my reflection from behind him. 

"I ... knew it" his voice was so quiet, soft and a little broken. It almost sounded familiar. He stood up, wiping vigorously at his eyes before turning around. He kept his eyes hidden as he began sobbing, running back to his private room and closing the door behind him. I blinked in confusion. My mind replaying the last few moments in my head. Why did that voice sound so familiar. I couldn't understand.. Oh.

Oh my god.

That was Phil Lester. 

Phil _Fucking_ Lester 

My childhood best friend who had _died_ when he was just sixteen years old. Except.. he was alive.

Alive. Alone. In Honey-Oake Mental Hospital.


	2. Chapter 2

My vision had started to blur, a high pitched whistle in my ears as the flaw seemed to get closer and closer to me. My head landing with a thud on the floor as everything went black. 

"Dan?" Louise was nudging me, making me feel a little better that I wasn't alone. I tried to sit up when i suddenly felt a wave of nausea hit me harder than a wrecking ball. I rid my stomach of its contents in the waste paper basket beside the sofa that I appeared to be laying on. Wait.. Where was I?

"Everything is going to be okay Dan" The blonde rubbed my back in slow and gentle circles as my consciousness came back to me. I sat up slowly and rubbed my head, I must have passed out but I could barely remember why. 

I looked around to find that I was in the staff room, laying on a disgustingly deep shade of green sofa that was very uncomfortable and must have been a reject from someones house. Louise passed me a glass of water which I gulped down greedily, enjoying the way the neutral sensation dulled and soothed the burning of my throat that was caused by my stomach acid. I couldn't stop thinking about it though. Phil was here. Phil was _here_ in a mental hospital with his own room. Louise was watching me with sad eyes which appeared to hold a lot of guilt. 

"Dan, i'm sorry we didn't tell you more about Phil. His case is a sensitive subject here so we try not to talk about it" She said with a wince, almost like she was struggling to believe her own words. I didn't understand. Phil's case was sensitive? Why did Phil's mother tell us he had died? There was just so much about Philip Michael Lester that didn't add up anymore. Would I ever be able to truly be his friend again? Louise had told me he rarely needed to be sedated and that he was mostly stable, so why was he here? 

The doctors all agreed to let me back onto the ward after I said that I just wanted to apologise to Phil, I could always go home after if I felt sick still. I approached his private room. Louise and PJ and the other nurses working around the rest of D ward leaving me alone to apologise. I knocked quietly on the door and waited for a sign, _anything at all_ that would be permission to enter. I wasn't waiting long, after only a few moments Phil was opening the large glass door. I couldn't help but gasp when I saw him, his eyes red and swollen beneath the thick frames of his glasses, his lips chapped and slightly bleeding from where he must have bitten into them. His eyes widened when he saw me but he didn't close the door, only stepping aside to let me inside. 

When I crossed the threshold into Phil's room i realised just how _permanent_ this arrangement must have been. All of Phil's possessions were here, it was almost like walking into the very same bedroom from when we were teenagers. I turned to find him walking slowly towards me. He looked almost like a baby giraffe, wobbling on his legs as he struggled his few steps towards me.  
"H-Hi Dan" he whispered, almost scared to talk at a normal volume in case I shattered, as if I were made of glass. I guess after I passed out that wasn't too far from the truth. 

"Hi Phil" I said calmly, a small smile on my lips. I walked the rest of the distance towards him. We were standing so close to one another, his body heat radiating from him like standing close to a fireplace. I gently raised my arm up, pausing as a silent question whether I could touch him, the faint line of his lips tipped into the slightest of smiles, he nodded the tiniest amount as I lowered my hand to his shoulder. I couldn't help but gasp as I felt the once familiar being beneath my hands. Tears slid effortlessly down my cheeks as I looked at him. I didn't realise exactly how _much_ of myself died along with him that day. Being able to have him back in my life again... was almost a fantasy. I honestly felt that he would vanish beneath my fingers. 

"I can't believe you're alive" I cried, sobs wracking through my body as I pulled back my hand, curling in on myself as I wrapped my own arms around myself. My sobs were wracking through me forcefully, the sheer power behind them stronger than I had felt since that day my best friend had been taken away from me. I refused to close my eyes, physically traumatised by the idea of him being gone. An _illusion_. I felt those strong arms wrap around me, making me feel secure and safe within seconds. My face tucked into the crook of his neck as my tears continued to fall. His arms protecting me from everything that could ever hurt me. 

"Its okay, bear. I'm here"

_Bear_

I hadn't heard that nickname in like... _seven years?_ making my sobs heavier as my body failed to hold me up, my legs giving way beneath me. I had expected to crash to the floor, my arms reaching out to grab at Phil as tight as possible. The next thing I knew was Phil lifting me up, carrying me fireman style to sit on his bed. My entire world stopped in that moment. I watched him as he knelt on the floor beside the bed. "You... you don't mind that I called you bear, did you? I'm sorry it just kind of came out" he said quietly, was he always this quiet spoken? I shook my head as I looked at him. I truly looked at him and took in how bright and expressionate his eyes were. The green and yellow flecks in the ocean blue captivating me just the same as it always had as a child. 

"Philly, I've missed being bear" I chuckled, tears forming in my eyes once again. I patted the bed beside me and he took a seat, reaching out to touch my hand in the same way I had done to his shoulder earlier. He smiled back at me, a proper _full_ smile that I hadn't seen in years. "I've missed being Philly". We didn't talk after that, simply holding onto one another in silence as we let time melt away. I would get back to work tomorrow, but for now. 

_I had my best friend back_


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, this is just a lil update. More is coming soon and the story will unfold a little more <3 <3 <3 
> 
> Come say hi on tumblr: alphalester.tumblr.com 
> 
> Love you all! 
> 
> Dominic xx

The Next Day

I arrived back at HoneyOake to find that PJ was waiting for me by the entrance. He smiled brightly at me, before taking me in his arms completely and squeezing for the briefest of moments. "Thank you for coming back" he said, letting go of me and looking me in the eyes. "Phil has been so happy, honestly. He's never been like this since he moved here. So just.. _thank you"_. 

We both went inside and went to our usual ward. It turns out that PJ hadn't started his shift yet, so when we arrived Chris was all over him and crying dramatically that he thought PJ had left him forever. PJ just smiled and went to sit with Chris for a moment as he knew it calmed him down so that Peej could actually do his work afterwards when Chris had worn himself out. Louise was sitting behind the desk writing up one of the patients notes and the other nurses were doing the observation rounds. I found myself itching to go to Phil, my body feeling irritated just knowing he was near me but not close enough. It was at that particular moment that Louise looked up at me and raised her eyebrows, nodding when I gestured towards Phil's room. I smiled back to her, before turning around and heading towards the private room. 

I knocked slowly and calmly on the door despite the nervous and excited energy that was pulsing through me like a second heartbeat. I waited for a moment before Phil emerged at the door, my breath caught in my throat at the man in front of me, wearing the most adorable Lion onesie reminding me of when we were kids. His hair was a mess and his glasses were on, but to me he was beautiful.

Wait... Did I just say Phil was beautiful?

"Bear! Come on in!" Phil was beaming at me, in a way that made me feel completely at ease. I entered the room to find it looking completely different to yesterday, everything was tidy.. well not even tidy it was.. gone? all of the puzzles and drawings were put away in his drawers and all of the clothes were off of the floor and now in his hamper by the end of the bed. Its as if he never had company before yesterday so it didn't matter where things were. I felt a familiar pang in my chest at Phil's situation that I _still_ knew nothing about. Philip Michael Lester, 25, Living in HoneyOake mental hospital permanently but to the outside world he were dead. "So bear, I know you have to actually work today" he paused to chuckle a little before patting the spot beside him on the bed for me to join him. "but will you perhaps come see me after you finish? I've never had visitors since I moved here". We talked for a few more minutes before I went back out to the ward and got on with my days work. 

I was quickly picking up the routine, breakfast, medication, assist them with shaving or personal care, keep them entertained, lunch, medication, etc. There had only been one incident today too, which was just Kenny at the end of the ward getting angry and going to punch Louise, so he was sedated a little (and honestly, it was only enough to relax him) so that he could explain why he was angry and it could be talked out. Kenny ended up apologising to Louise too which was promising. I had just finished playing chess with Chris when Phil walked out of his room, choosing to sit by the large window and just staring as life went on around him. I went to sit with him then, close enough he could feel me nearby but far enough that I wasn't suffocating him. 

"You okay, Philly?" I asked gently, my voice quieter and softer than usual to try and relax him. Phil had tears in his eyes, he didn't look like the Phil I had sat with earlier. He looked stressed out, I didn't talk anymore, just accompanying him until he was ready to talk. I didn't want to trigger anything. Phil never spoke, merely sliding towards me a little and resting his head on my shoulder. In seconds, I could see tear tracks sliding down his cheeks through the reflection in the window. Seconds later, sobs were wracking through him uncontrollably, his entire body shaking as he curled in on himself. I wrapped my arms around him, offering to be the safety blanket that he needed so much. He'd been alone for so many years. I was determined to stay with him. 

"B-bear.." Phil tried, his fists clenched so hard that his nails must be digging into his palms. I knew I probably shouldn't seeing as I was working, but I pulled Phil into my lap where I sat on the floor, letting him use my body heat and my heart beat to physically calm him in a way he hadn't experienced since he was a child. He tensed up in my lap and I whispered to him, trying to get him to relax in the only way I knew how. "Shhh, it's okay Philly. Bear is here, okay? Bear is here holding you. You're safe, you're on the ward okay?" Phil relaxed by the time I had finished my sentence, I wondered what it was that relaxed him when I heard him whispering, chanting to himself as if to remind himself something important. 

" _Bear is here, Bear is holding me, Bear is here"_


	4. Chapter 4

I stayed with Phil long after my shift had finished, simply not wanting to leave him whilst he was vulnerable. I know that there was a story here, but there was something not quite right about Philip Lester and his situation. Despite his earlier breakdown, I didn't feel like he deserved to be here, Phil wasn't _mental_ he was lonely. He was _alone_ and I needed him not to be. I can't believe that within my grieving over his supposed death, I had forgotten exactly how close we had been. 

We did everything together, basically inseparable. I remembered that Phil's home life wasn't the best, he would often come to my house in the middle of the night, so I had started leaving my bedroom window ajar in case he wanted to come in. He'd never wake me though, always saying that my sleep was the priority and simply slide into bed and hold me tight to him for comfort. I knew he would be gone by the morning, making sure his parents wouldn't catch him being gone from the house. We would always walk to school together though, as if nothing had happened. 

Phil curled up in a ball on the bed, his head resting in my lap as I thought back to our younger days, when everything wasn't necessarily simple but it was a lot simpler than this. I just felt so many emotions. I didn't want to go home tonight, despite the fact that I wasn't even at HoneyOake tomorrow as it was my study day at University. I would be back the day after but somehow that seemed so far away, almost too far to be away from the man who was once my best friend. 

"Bear, i'm sorry for freaking out" the voice was so soft I almost hadn't heard it at all, my fingers gently threaded through his hair and caressed his scalp in a way that I knew would relax him. I hummed softly, not wanting to talk unless he wanted me to. He shuffled a little in my lap and wrapped an arm around my waist. "Sometimes, I forget that life is real outside of these walls. I've been here for so long now" he added wistfully, almost like he was in his own world and simply talking into the air, as if he expected nobody to listen or reply. I frowned a little before deciding I should probably interject something. It probably wasn't the best thing I could have said but.. I needed him to know that I missed him in his absence 

"I wish I knew you were here, I would have visited you all the time" my fingers tangling further in his hair as I smiled sadly. "but i'm here now". Phil sat up from his place in my lap, his eyes shining with unshed tears. "you always were here when I needed you" he smiled a little before moving back towards me, and wrapping his arms around me. "thank you Bear, for everything". 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> Sorry for the shit chapter! But I have been so busy with work so I have been using my free time to write up a Christmas fic so feel free to check out ‘A Christmas Miracle’ 
> 
> Also feel free to come talk to me on tumblr  
> alphalester.tumblr.com
> 
> Thanks for your patience!! 
> 
> \- Dominic xox

I woke up with a throbbing headache, reaching over for the glass of water I had put beside my bed on the nightstand. I decided not to set an alarm today, knowing it was a study day anyway which meant I didn't need to go to Honey-Oake nor University so long as I did something creative with my time. Fat chance that was going to happen. Instead, I grabbed my phone and logged into my google drive, opening the folder to the photos of when I was a child, I grinned when I realised Phil was in a lot of these photos. I had never wanted to look at them in the past, when I thought Phil had died I stopped reminiscing about our years of causing trouble. Except Phil _wasn't_ dead. 

I clicked on the first one and it was a photo of Phil on his own, sitting on the forest floor pointing his index fingers towards a makeshift fire he had built in front of him, his eyes scrunched shut, glasses on and his smile creating little wrinkles in his cheeks. I felt my heartbeat quicken as I looked at him, his hair was so much longer and shaggier back then. I grinned, flicking across to the next one, an image of both of us hugging each other that mum must have taken at my birthday party. He'd bought me a pack of pokemon cards, which - i know seems silly now, but back then that's all that I had wanted, my parents not bothering to listen to me enough to get them so Phil had done it instead. I skipped once more to a picture of us both in onesies, just days before he supposedly 'died' and he looked happy to me, his smile wasn't as big but he was holding me close, arms wrapped around me from behind as I grinned into the camera. The Winnie-The-Pooh onesie too big for me but I didn't mind. It was perfect to me. _Because Phil had bought it me._

_Phil had always gotten me everything I wanted_

I got in the car and drove towards my mother's house, deciding to see if any of our old things were still in the attic. I was welcomed with a warm hug and a cup of tea, immediately launching into how university was going seeing as I was almost a fully qualified mental health nurse. We talked for hours and I felt better about seeing her. When it came to leaving time, I headed out and mum said goodbye at the door, only for us to run into the neighbours. _Phil’s parents_

“Daniel Howell! My, look how you’ve grown!” Mrs Lester said, approaching me excitedly and wrapping her arms around me, a thing she never used to do. I smiled falsely, greeting her. “how old are you now?” She asked. I couldn’t help but feel anger towards her, realising I didn’t know her side of the story, but she’d always been a weird woman. Phil was always upset whenever he was at home with his parents, it’s why I always went over there. “I’m 21 now. Four years younger than Phil” I said, knowing that it was a shit thing to say to someone who supposedly had a dead son. Except I knew the truth. I saw her tense up in front of me. My mum started reeling off my achievements like any parent does, Mrs Lester staring at me nervously the second mum said I was training to be a mental health nurse. 

I got home feeling exhausted, I finished my university assignment and emailed it to my tutor. I watched movies for the rest of the evening but I couldn’t get a Phil off of my mind. I couldn’t wait to see him the next day. 


	6. Chapter 6

When I got to HoneyOake the following day, I knew there was a problem. A huge problem. 

"We're going to have to sedate him" Louise said, looking to PJ who nodded disappointingly. That's when I heard it, the ear drum piercing wail of someone very familiar. I ran towards the private room, Phil's private room. What I saw was heart breaking. Phil was completely freaking out to the point where he was chanting repeatedly, his mother standing just a few steps away from him. She was standing over him, clearly making the most of none of the mental health team being in the room. 

"Mrs Lester, I'm going to have to ask you to step away from Phil now" I interjected calmly, keeping my voice as neutral as I could. I walked over to Phil and slowly and calmly sat down beside him on his space on the floor. "Bear's here now, Philly" I said quietly, not thinking it would even get through to Phil in this state, except it did. He threw himself onto my lap, wrapping all of his limbs around me like a little koala bear. I shushed him as I ran my hand reassuringly down his back. "Bear's here" I said once more, focusing entirely on Phil rather than the vile woman in front of us. PJ and Louise ran in moments after, asking Mrs Lester to leave because Phil clearly doesn't want her here. He'd shut down, holding onto me with all his strength as he chanted "bear is here, mum can't hurt me" repeatedly. 

"I can't let that boy be near my son" Mrs Lester shouted, "he's done enough damage in the past". Everything stopped, it was like time was frozen. Had I damaged Phil? I couldn't remember doing anything except helping him from his vile parents and their constant shouting. "You, you little _faggot_ made my son gay". This must have awakened something in Phil, he stood up, turning to his mother and glaring at her like nothing I'd seen before. 

"Don't you DARE blame Dan for my sexuality" Phil was holding me behind him, as if protecting me from a dragon.. well.. his mother was sort of a dragon. "You didn't like the fact that he meant the world to me, he was always there when you and Dad weren't. You thought hitting me would get me to stop my feelings but it just pushed me closer to him. Don't you see that?" Phil was shouting, my heart had stopped completely. I remembered that Phil thought he was gay back from all those years ago as I told him that I was bisexual. I had never realised that was the reason for his parents behaviour.

"Listen here you little brat" his mother spat, only separated from us by the mental health nurses who were serving as a wall between Phil and Mrs Lester. "We pay extortionate prices for you to live here, don't you see that?". I stopped, confused. His mother paid for him to be here? He wasn't a patient? What did that even mean? My insides were churning and squeezing as I remembered they'd told everyone Phil knew that he had died, yet he wasn't dead and he wasn't apparently a true mental patient.. What was the truth? 

"Mrs Lester, we need to ask you to leave" Louise's voice rang through clearer than anything I'd heard in that entire conversation. Phil's mother was forced out of the building when Phil just turned and looked at me, assessing the damage. "Dan..." he had tears in his eyes as he pulled me closer into his arms. My tears instantly built up in my eyes, trailing down my face as they burned like acid. It clicked in my mind. I was the reason Phil lived in this mental institution. They thought it was my fault he was gay so they sent him away and told everyone that he had died.

“Dad moved me here so mum wouldn’t hit me anymore” Phil said quietly, “I only found that out this morning, he told mum it was because I was gay but he did it because I was safer here”. I hadn’t seen Phil’s dad in a long time coming to think about it. They must have split up once she told everyone phil died. I held him close as we both cried silently, we had the truth and that was all that mattered. We just needed to get Phil his life back and I had a plan. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The End <3

This was it. This was the day that Phil had been waiting for since he could remember. I was just happy that I was able to help him get his life back. I had rented a flat close to University that we would both share, it was small but had two bedrooms, a bathroom, kitchen and lounge so what more did we need? I couldn't help but feel a little glad not to live on campus anymore either. 

When I arrived at Honey-Oake, my work placement here had been over now for an entire week. I was welcomed by a large hug - except it wasn't from who I had expected. I looked down in my arms to find Chris Kendall grinning up at me. "Thank you Dan, taking Phil away will mean PJ has more time for me!" he cheered, making me chuckle a little. He let me go and returned to his bed so that PJ wouldn't shout at him. I walked through the hospital and couldn't help but smile. I was no longer staff here, and Phil was no longer a resident. I headed over to Phil's room, all his things were gone as they were in the moving van already headed over to our new home. He grinned at me when he saw me, a gentle rose colour tainting his cheeks.

"This is going to be so weird, Bear" Phil smiled, walking towards me with his arms open wide in his need for a hug. I obliged, admiring the way that our bodies slotted together into the embrace so well, reminding me of our teenage years. "I haven't been outside in literally YEARS" Phil whispered, breath tickling my neck. I frowned for a moment before I realised what he was trying to get across. I had given him the freedom that he'd been oh so desperate for. That feeling made me want to cry. I had given Phil his life once more, one without abuse, without four walls and medication being given to make you feel drowsy and numb every time he got the slightest bit worked up. 

When we pulled away from the hug, Phil took my hand in his and intertwined our fingers, seemingly not wanting to let me go. I didn't object, it felt.. right. 

\---

When we said our goodbyes and headed to our new home, Phil was delighted. He'd gotten so amazed by the sights before him and wondered how he'd ever forgotten what life outside was like. We decided to walk to our new home, walking slowly so that Phil could enjoy his freedom properly. I couldn't help but grin every time he pointed to a pigeon eating food off of the floor or when he'd excitedly tell me something that was happening on the street. It was so freeing to experience this with him. My best friend, who despite the trauma he'd faced was still the same excitable and random Phil Lester. 

When Phil walked into the flat, his eyes lit up. It was open and spacious, not the boring white or magnolia he'd endured at the hospital but instead light charcoal greys and blues that showed him that he now had a life in colour. When I told him we'd have a bedroom each, his smile shrank a small amount. "so.. we aren't sharing?" he asked, making me blush at the concept. I never even thought about it, thinking that Phil would want space on his own. I smiled as my thumb absentmindedly stroked over the back of his hand that were still locked in my own. "Well, you can come sleep in my room whenever you want, but I thought you may want space to reflect and have you time too. This is a big thing Phil, you're finally getting to live your life the way you want to live it. I wont control it like your parents did". 

Phil moved closer once again, his eyes threatening to spill their unshed tears as he pressed a tiny kiss to the corner of my mouth, before suddenly realising what he'd done. "I just.. I can't believe you're really wanting to live with me. To help me figure out how to live again" a single tear bursting from his waterline as he ran a hand through my curls which made me shiver. "Y'know, when I first got shipped off there I always thought about you. Every. Single. Day. I had always hoped you would free me" his fingers massaging my scalp as a feeling of calm washed over me, listening to his words. "It almost felt like a fairy tail. Parents locking a kid up, just in a mental hospital instead of a tower". He chuckled a little as his free arm rested on my arm. "But I always felt you'd be my prince charming. Thinking that you would free me one day was got me through each day. Until, you did" more tears slipped down his cheeks quickly, dropping to land in the flourescent green of his tshirt. "So, thank you. Daniel Howell. For being my prince even after so many years of thinking I were dead." 

My own tears fell, with a new found confidence I leaned forward and captured his lips with my own. It was soft but reassuring, it was gentle and special. It was us and that was perfect to me. "Thank you for not leaving me, a piece of me died the day I thought you had". We had a new beginning. An exciting one that resulting in gentle kisses and late night cuddles in bed talking of the future we never imagined we'd get to share together. I got to see Phil as he used to be all those years ago. I loved him and he loved me. I was his prince charming and he was my world. I would never lose him again, that was for certain. 


End file.
